our tale about everyday adventures and discovering the world

Big (little) man on campus


You know all those people who look longingly at your young children and tell you, “Gosh, I miss those days. Appreciate them when they’re young!” They tell you this in the grocery store while your toddler has just pooped his pants, your preschooler is screaming about granola bars and you’re about to cry.

I’m feeling like I might say that to someone soon.  And I apologize in advance.

It’s his last year of preschool. How did this happen?


I’m not ready for him to start pronouncing things correctly.

When you play this game, it weepeats.

There’s a Waiders sign.

It’s in the minnel dwawer, then bwing it.

Thwee wed, thwee puhple, thwee bwack…

 I’m not ready for him to stop thinking like a preschooler.

Are there dinosaurs in our world?

(Pointing to a car.) Is that a Leopard? (Jaguar.)

When you were a little girl I was in your tummy watching you do cartwheels.

Are there buffalos in our world?

(Pointing to his chin, confused.) You wear a chin guard here? (Shin guard.)

Do Grandma and Grandpa live in our world?

I’m not ready for him to join his brother at school next year. (Or for Fin to want to wear his kindergarten uniform to his first day of preschool!)

Eli, will you take a picture with your brother on his first day?


Eli, can you smile?




Soon I’m going to miss Fin saying (loudly) that someone is fat or shouting about “nipple covers” in public or testing me non-stop. I’m going to miss the days when all he wants to do the day before school is spend the day with me and nobody else. (And test me more.)


Last night he drew a picture of the two of us. He told me he was “floating away” but I was holding on to him. Then he added Dad and Eli. Hours later he sobbed for a half an hour about school. In between sobs he told me he was nervous because he didn’t know his new teachers. He missed Teacher Esther and was worried he’d never find another teacher who would play tag with him. He was worried about school.


And then he was ready. But I’m still not.


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